Dear Colorado, It's Not You, It's Me

Dear Colorado,

It's Not You, It's Me. We are breaking up. I’ve realized over the past few months that it just isn’t meant to be for you and I.

Yes, I know, we had a lot of fun together these past three years—the skiing, the hiking, the running races.  

It hasn’t been perfect—our six and a half hour fight during the Pike’s Peak Ascent half marathon was rough, but we survived and I was stronger for it. Then there was the ten miles up and down through Garden of the Gods when I hated you for hurting me, but forgave you when I got the free massage afterwards. And dare I mention the Bolder Boulder, when I got pegged with marshmallows and splashed with beer? Right, I better not—that’s water under the bridge…or slip and slide.

You got along with my family and you loved my dogs as your own. Your acres and acres of dog parks with mountain views and dog-friendly restaurants and stores had me at hello. You were patient with me when I was nervous around your pets. I didn’t mind the black bear that you brought into my neighborhood, and your prairie dogs are kind of cute even if they do have the bubonic plague. You taught me that I shouldn’t try to find a loose “dog’s” owners if it is actually a coyote and that was a good lesson. Honestly, I’m glad I never met your cougar though and your fox was shifty, to say the least. And I’m sorry I ran over your pet rabbit that one time—he ran under my tire, I swear.

You introduced me to new things, like Rocky Mountain Oysters (ew!), dipping pizza crust into honey (yum!), and Red Rocks Amphitheater (fabulous).

Your personality can’t be beat: your easy-going Breckenridge, your down-to-earth Colorado Springs, your adventurous Manitou Springs, your wild Estes Park, your friendly-SuperBowl-winning Denver, and your funny and free-spirited Boulder. You brought out sides of my personality I didn’t know existed before. And you accepted all my flaws and differences with your kind, generous love. You even forgave me for my transplantedness, although some of your cousins didn’t (ahem, 9news comment section).

So why am I breaking up with you? Because no matter how much I love you, I loved Ohio first. He may not be as wild and adventurous as you, but he has been faithful to me since I first met him in 1982. Sure he isn't going to be the next American Ninja Warrior but next fall he may become a partner at his firm and he has some stock vesting next year. He has promised me family, friends, quiet country mornings and a lower cost of living. He also promises to never I-25 me at rush hour, or I-70 me on a freshly powdered winter morning and that’s gotta count for something, right? You may be Paul Newman but he is Humphrey Bogart. You may be Iron Man but he is Hawkeye. You may be Jurassic Park but he is Jurassic World (or at least the third one with the cool pterodactyls). Plus he has Cedar Point and actual pumpkin patches...just sayin'.

Anyway, thank you for the memories. I’ll never forget you. I won’t cry because it’s over—I’ll smile because it happened. I may even come out for a visit if Ohio’s winter grey skies get on my nerves—I hope you don’t mind. I’m sure you will find someone new with all the other fish in the sea—namely the 100,000 that are estimated to move here in the next year.

Love, Janine